every now and again i need to re-up my beauty game.  shock of all shocks, i don’t wake up with a faceful of glitter (most of the time…) and my hair isn’t naturally toxic orange.

backstory: i hate the term “fag hag”.  it’s insulting to both the gay and straight communities; fag and hag are tacky and degrading, plus they rhyme. but i’m deep in the gay community, from my time working at a boutique gym that catered to 90’s clubkids and celebrigays while in college… and i spend a few days a week at Patricia Field, the 40+ year old boutique belonging to the awesome-as-shit stylist. point being, i have a lot of gay friends, but my friends are not fags, and i’m not a hag. i’m a homosexual associate.

a perk to being friends with gay men is they LOOOOVE beauty.  my longtime friend, the supertalented stephen dimmick took me to the super-hidden-secret-awesome MAC PRO store.  it took me a few minutes post entrance to regain focus and stop shaking, because, well look:

    

giant jars of pigments line the walls.  and their colour palate is so extensive it made me temporarily stupid.  needless to say we spent time geeking out over the subtleties of undertones and finding the perfect way to turn chola-brown liner into a couture, wearable look. i’m apologizing in advance.

i spent that afternoon at another longtime friend’s house, charley brown.  charley is a friend first, and incredible hairstylist, second.  he’s assisted on shoots with gwen stefani and beyonce’s loreal hair commercial ::yawn:: no big deal.  the dear is making me a clip-on-weave out of 4 packs of various colours and lengths of human hair (because that’s how i roll…) and i helped him pack his apartment for a successful move.

 

fyi: you’re looking at two gigantic piles of wigs.  we packed a 2 x 2 x 4 foot BOX filled with WIGS. seriously guys, no big deal.

considering this was followed by the premiere of ru paul’s “drag race” (for the unfamiliar, it’s like america’s next top model + project runway + drag queens) i had better work.  and i MUST thank ru paul for giving america (or the small portion of america who watches “drag race”, aka: manhattan) a fantastic acronym for CUNT: Creativity, Uniquess, Nerve, and Talent.  Honey, GLADLY.

ps: i’ll get better at this blog thing. any questions about my inability to write please see post #1. xx